Father and Sons Male Bonding

I wanted some peace and quiet time while surfing the internet so I suggested to Dolzer why don't he tell a story to our boys to keep them from distracting me. Their favorite is Cao Cao's 100,000 arrows (Romance of the Three Kingdoms). The story has been told since Chicky was in my tummy as well as Porky and now it's Ngau ngau's turn.

Dolzer certainly has a way with words where each time he re-tells the story it's always fresh and inspiring to the boys. They never got tired of it though I doubt if they truly understand what it means. It's more on the tone of voice, face expression and attention given that captivates them.

The story of Cao Cao's 100,000 arrows by Dolzer

It happen during the Battle of the Red Cliff. There are 3 major super powers, Cao Cao (being the largest), Sun Quan (2nd largest) and Liu Bei (very small kingdom with great many talents ie Guan Yu, Zhang Fei & Zhuge Liang).

Liu Bei lost to Cao Cao and send his great strategist Zhuge Liang to Wu Kingdom (Lord: Sun Quan) to negotiate an alliance. Zhuge Liang managed to convince Sun Quan to fight against Cao Cao. Sun Quan also has a strategist, Zhou Yu and he has been waiting for an opportunity to wage war against Cao Cao.

However, when Zhou Yu found out about the alliance and also heard of his extreme strategism, he realized Zhuge Liang may pose a threat in the future. (The Battle of the Red Cliff is a mind game between Cao Cao and Zhou Yu. Zhuge Liang presence trigger certain events to create opportunity for the benefit of his lord, Liu Bei. Thus, Zhuge Liang became an eye sore of Zhou Yu.)

One night, after Zhou Yu won a skirmish against Cao Cao troops, Zhuge Liang came to congratulate him. Their conversation went:

Zhuge Liang: Congratulation on your victory, commander.
Zhou Yu: It's nothing. Small potato. So tell me Mr. Zhuge. What is the most important weapon in a navel warfare?
Zhuge Liang: Bows and arrows.
Zhou Yu: YES, and we're lacking of 100,000 arrows.
Zhuge Liang: Oh, I'll settle it.
Zhou Yu: Sure or not? I'll give you 10 days.
Zhuge Liang: 3 days will do.
Zhou Yu: Ha! And if you can't deliver on time?
Zhuge Liang: Then I'll surrender myself to marshal law.
Zhou Yu: Ok. You must sign a warrant then.

Zhuge Liang: Whatever that makes you happy. But I do request for troops to help me prepare.

Zhou Yu: I'll give you 100 men.
Zhuge Liang: Thanks.
Zhou Yu: *thinking in his heart* You're dead meat!

Zhou Yu assigned 100 good-for-nothing men to Zhuge Liang. But Zhuge Liang didn't mind. For the first two days Zhuge Liang and his men ate and drank heartily. On the third day, Zhuge Liang loaded 20 boats with straws and scarecrows.

During evening, he invited Zhou Yu's military advisor to come aboard for a drink. When nightfall approached, the river was filled with fog. Zhuge Liang then ordered his men to set sail straight into Cao Cao's main camp.

As they approached the shores, Zhuge Liang ordered his men to start drumming and shouting like there's no tomorrow. Cao Cao was shocked and thought it was a surprise attack by Zhou Yu. With such heavy fog, Cao Cao can't see clearly and ordered his archers to shower thousands and thousands of arrows towards the direction of the drums and shouts.

Thousands and thousands of arrows stuck on the boats, straws and scarecrows.

Artist Impression (looks like porcupine)

As the fog was about to lift, Zhuge Liang ordered the boats to turn around and shouted:
"Thank you Prime Minister Cao for the arrows!!!"

Taken from Battle of the Red Cliff Part II (more like it)

When they reach back to their camp, Zhou Yu was waiting and fuming mad at Zhuge Liang for accomplishing such task. The military advisor who witnessed the entire ordeal was struck dumb at Zhuge Liang's brilliance. The end.

Dolzer reluctantly agreed and just as he was positioning them comfortably on the bed, things took a turn for the worst:

Dolzer: Go up the bed if you want story.
Chicky: Up the bedddd~

Porky sneaks up on Dolzer and climb on his back.

Dolzer: Aaah... Who is it?
Porky: Gu gu gu...

That's right. Porky is already past 2 years and he still refuse to talk. His greatest accomplishment is calling Daddy in the morning for his milk. That also I believe is completely random.

Chicky: Daddy. Watcha doin?
Dolzer: Get off Porky. Chicky! Don't push didi. GET OFF!!!
Porky: Aguuu... *rub rub using butt*


Dolzer: One last chance. If the both of you want story, sit down properly and ...

Porky turns around, pushes Dolzer on his stomach and climbs on top again. Follows by Chicky.

Dolzer: Aaah...
Chicky: Daddee...
Porky: Gu gu gu...

Chicky: Take picturrrr~ Mummy take. Picturrrr~
Porky: Mmm mmm...
Dolzer gasping for air.


Chicky: Aah... Fall down.
Dolzer: Dear, could you help me out here?
Hellzbunny: Shoo... I'm suppose to be invisible.


Chicky: No didi... burabachep charaee... ehburrrhabachep... *babbles babbles*
Hellzbunny: NO! Speak properly!
Porky: Gu gu gu...

This tends to happen when Chicky got too excited, he will let out a torrent of baby babbles. It's becoming a very bad habit and each time he does that I gave him a stern warning.


Chicky: Daddy~ Brush teeth. Open up.
Dolzer: Aaaaaah... Aaaaaah... That hurts.


Chicky: Daddy. Daddy, are you OK? Daddy~

Porky starting to shriek.


Dolzer: Get off Porky! Stop doing that on daddy's head!
Chicky: Ee ack ee ack... *hums Ultraman theme song*

Porky attempts again and again to climb over Dolzer's head while Dolzer pushes him away. Chicky took advantage of the moment to step on top of Dolzer (forbidden Dolzer's rule ever since Chicky weight hits over 25 kgs). In a breath: SMACKDOWN.

Dolzer: OOOOOOOOOOOhhoohoooohooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!
Chicky: Daddy dinosaur monster~ Hehehe...
Porky: Gu gu gu...

No more pics taken because Dolzer was in REAL PAIN and I quickly take Porky away from the bed. Chicky, on the other hand, sprint off from the room as soon as he sense danger from the acute shout of Dolzer. I took Porky out of the room as well, went downstairs and ask maid to prepare some fruits and a coconut. We didn't go back to the room until the maid delivered the refreshment.

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Hehehe...